The Perfect Man?

We’ve all been there. Someone starts paying you a little extra attention. Their smile curves your lips. Their stare reddens your cheeks. Their words are spoken with a hidden meaning. You contemplate their question. They imagine their future with you. You imagine your future with them. You know those dreams that are gone in a glimpse? You see the two of you tomorrow, then a wedding dress, a house, kids and eventually the rocking chairs on the front porch. They are assessing you and you are evaluating them. In your mind, everything seems perfect.

Until you are brought back to reality. Yes, he has an incredible smile. Yes, he is polite. Yes, he makes you feel like a million dollars. Yes. Yes. Yes. You can continue rationalising and ticking multiple boxes but there is one box you cannot tick. It’s the most important box. Everything else is debatable. What they look like, where they work, what sport they play.

Some things are negotiable. Some things are preferences. Yet if you are a Christian and strive to take up your cross and follow Christ, when you are looking for a husband, there is one thing that cannot be negotiated.

He must be a Christian.

I didn’t say, ‘he must go to church’. I didn’t say,’ he must believe in Jesus’. I didn’t say, ‘he must have been baptized’. There are many people in this world who go to church, honestly believe that Jesus was God and were baptised as infants. This does not make them a Christian. There is a difference. Hear me out.

A guy can seem like the man of your dreams. He might compliment you. He might call your mum ‘Mrs’ and your dad ‘Sir’. He might open the car door for you. He might buy you flowers. Heck, he might even drive you to church and sit in the front pew with you! Just because he does all these things, doesn’t mean he is the perfect man.

The thing is that the Bible clearly states that as Christians, we are not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14).

Often, people can appear to be something that they are not. I know so many Christian women who married charming men. These attractive men knew what their girlfriends wanted them to be and so they played the part til they made those girlfriends their wives. Only too late did these wives learn that their husbands had been pretending all along.

To this day these women continue to struggle living with a man who does share their beliefs or they are living alone because their husband ran off with someone else.

The thing with feelings is that we get caught up in the moment, rather than seeing the bigger picture. We see them as they are now and how they make us feel instead of really asking who they will become and facing the hard truth.

On the other hand, I have seen so many Christian couples who are shining God’s light, just in the way they relate to each other. Their common belief brings them together for a common cause. Rather than arguing, they are in a partnership. Together they are seeing more and more people come to know Jesus. They are selfless and put each other before themselves. They read their Bible and spur each other on to become better people. They pray together. At my church I see elderly couples more in love now than ever. I see old men opening the door for their wives who now have walkers or wheelchairs.

I want a man who will one day become an old man like the ones I see at my church. If you want some one like that, they need to be showing those qualities now. Don’t just hope for the best thinking they’ll develop them later on.

Plainly put. If you want an eagle, don’t pick up a crocodile egg and expect it to transform.

On a final note, how can anyone argue with 2 Corinthians 6:14?

“Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?”

Don’t set yourself up for failure. See the potential beauty that comes, if you will only be patient.

C

Jesus > Religion

Watch this video clip and encounter an immensely thought provoking poem that confronts us with the differences between being religious and being a Christian.

Growing up in a conservative Baptist church, I know what it means to be mindful of tradition and to have respect for the things of the past. We sing hymns, pray and pass around the red, velvet offering bags. Only after encountering people of other denominations am I seeing the vast differences that span within the Christian faith.

Pentecostals, Uniting Church, Catholics, Anglicans, Non-Denominational, if they believe the Bible and live by what it says, they are my brothers and sisters.

I love that I can speak with people from all over the world and have an instant connection with them through our faith in Jesus. It is just like meeting distant cousins you never knew.

I have always noticed that people believe slightly different things, but as long as they believe the fundamental truths, I turn a blind eye. Why is it that now, ‘religion’ is suddenly getting in the way?

I am meeting people whose acts of worship feel like barriers between us. I cannot understand. I cannot relate. I cannot see past these rituals to the truth.

If I strive hard to understand, I can see how these rituals seem appealing, yet I feel they are unnecessary and their appearances are merely superfluous grass, blocking our vision to see past toward the glorious flower that is salvation by grace.

Religion looks good. It is appealing. It makes us feel like we have some control over our destinies but if we believe that anything we do will earn God’s favour, we are simply kidding ourselves.

In Matthew 6:5- 8 Jesus says:

“Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.  “So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. ³ But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, ⁴ so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. ⁶ But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. ⁷ And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. ⁸ Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.”

Ultimately, religion is a show and Jesus was encouraging us to break free of that and to search out our motives and genuineness of heart. As Christians, we ought to care more about God and what he thinks of us than what the people around us see.

Eyes On Him

Tonight at college we were learning about the Psalms and  Hebrew poetry. There is always so much more in the word of God than we could ever imagine. When you are studying the Bible it can be easy to fall into the trap of only looking at things from a distance but I liked what the guys said tonight. He said “if you just read the Bible for information, you’ll only become more religious”. When you read the Bible, you should be learning more about the nature of God and be drawn into a deeper intimacy with him.

I think a lot of us like the Psalms simply because we can relate to them. Psalm upon psalm of men crying out to God in the hard times and praising him in the good times. And it is also inspiring to read about someone who is struggling but nevertheless, managed to praise God all the more.

Sometimes we need to take our minds of ourselves. Away from our current circumstances. Apart from our own selfish desires. And just focus on the fullness and beauty of the awesome God that we have. Stop living in a daydream and focus on a reality.

I chose to share about the following Psalm because it stops looking at our past, present of future and instead looks up at God and helps us to put things into perspective. Check this out hey? It paints an incredible image. How about at ever comma, actually pause and imagine the phrase you just read. See how focusing on God like this can change your own perspective on life.

 “By the word of the Lord the heavens were made,
    their starry host by the breath of his mouth.
He gathers the waters of the sea into jars;
    he puts the deep into storehouses.
Let all the earth fear the Lord;
    let all the people of the world revere him.
 For he spoke, and it came to be;
    he commanded, and it stood firm.”

-Psalm 33:6-9